Don't wait for someone else to tell you who you are
Believe it or not, I wasn't always comfortable or confident in myself.
Growing up as a first generation Canadian to Vietnamese refugees, and survivors of war, was both beautiful and complex.
I remember coming home from school one day and crying as a 4 year old, asking my parents why they hadn't taught me fluent English. I didn't feel like I belonged at school.
I remember being put into Vietnamese after school programs and strongly feeling disconnected to that part of my identity. I didn't want to be there.
As a teenager, I wanted to have blonde hair and be super skinny. Because that's all I saw on TV.
When I started to grow boobs, I was told that they were “too big for an Asian”. So I spent years covering up my chest, trying to look small and feeling super uncomfortable in my own body.
When I came to Vietnam, I mostly spoke English. Too embarrassed to speak Vietnamese, even though I can speak it fluently.
And even in Vietnam, I've had moments where I felt like I didn't belong because I was told I was too Western, and too big, to really be Vietnamese.
In one place I was “too Asian”, and in another “too Western”.
Over the years as I delved deeper into building a relationship with myself, I started to bring awareness to how much of my behaviour and mindset had been conditioned to “always fit in”.
This looked like:
People pleasing to the max
Having no boundaries
Being sick, tired, stressed and burnt out often
Hiding and bottling up my feelings
Comparing myself to others
Constantly seeking external validation
It's been a journey, and a process, to transform these things.
Sometimes it was easy. Often it was challenging.
Through the work of strengthening my relationship to self, I trust myself more. I feel more courageous and confident. I feel bold and proud of who I am.
And it's not tied to being Vietnamese, or Canadian. Or what colour hair I have. Or what size my boobs are.
It's actually all inward.
It's the practice of understanding myself as a whole being.
It's the practice of self compassion, and compassionate inquiry.
It's the practice of being in communities that see me, and hold space for me to be authentic.
And, it's learning how to do this in ways that support my continued transformation into who I want to be and what I want life to be like.
Although my experience is my experience, I know many people whom this will resonate with… on some level or another.
You're not alone.
And you're not stuck.
That's why I care so deeply about the women that come together in my 3-week foundations course, because as a community, and as individuals, we come together to DO THE INNER WORK.
We get UN-STUCK.
We use the tools of mindfulness, breathwork, meditation, yoga, guided visualizations, creative writing, mindset and coaching (all with a trauma-informed lens) to explore and practice connecting back to self.
Don't wait for someone else to tell you who you are.
Learn to listen to yourself.
Learn to trust yourself.
Learn to be more courageous and confident as you are.
Ready to tap into who you are? Program details + payment plans + testimonials here.